Friday, August 14, 2009

"The Friends We Keep" by Sarah Zacharias Davis

Edited 8.25.09: Congratulations Amy! You are the winner of the "Friends" giveaway. Thank you to everyone who left a comment. I enjoyed reading about your friendships.

I've made, and lost, a lot of friends in my short 34 years. Partly because we moved A LOT when I was growing up (9 school changes from K-12 qualifies as a lot!!) and partly because friendships are never static.

Summer 2009 brought with it two reminders of the ever-changing nature of friendship. First, I reconnected with several high school friends via Facebook. I NEVER thought I'd hear from that period of my life again!!

Reminder #1 Friends can come back into your life.

Secondly, my friend, Amy, announced that her family is moving an hour away. An hour is a long way when you are used to seeing someone every Sunday!

Reminder #2 Friends can leave your (daily) life after a season.

So, with all this in mind, I agreed to review The Friends We Keep: A Woman's Quest for the Soul of Friendship by Sarah Zacharias Davis. It seemed like a good time to read about friendships!

The Friends We Keep is not a how-to book. There aren't any tips on making or keeping friends. It's really more of a introspective look at why friendships change, the different roles we play in friendships, and why some friendships survive while others drift apart.

I most enjoyed the personal accounts in this book. It's comforting to hear that other women have drifted apart as their lives have taken different paths. It's also inspiring to read how a friend for a season can change a person.

As much as I enjoyed the personal accounts, I was a little disappointed by the frequent quotes and references to secular culture. I'm not saying secular culture is all bad. After all, how could a woman of my generation (which I think Davis is) write a book about friends and NOT refer to Anne of Green Gables and her bosom friend, Diana?!

It's just that using the four friends from "S*x in the City" as an example of ideal female friendships makes me very uncomfortable. I've never watched an episode in its entirety but I am aware that most of the show is contrary to my morals and beliefs.

But, this is not a review of popular culture and how much Christians should partake of it. I only mention these references because I feel a responsibility to my readers to know that I do not agree with everything included in this book.

Having said all of that, I have an additional copy to give away to a reader. Leave a comment by August 19 telling us about your oldest (or dearest, newest, etc.) friend and you will be entered in the drawing.


I also have the privilege of recommending one of my favorite authors to you!!

Kay Arthur is a speaker, teacher and author. She is also a co-founder of Precepts Minstries.

The 40 Minute Bible Study series from beloved Bible teacher Kay Arthur and the teaching staff of Precept Ministries tackles important issues in brief, easy-to-grasp lessons you can use personally or for small-group discussion. Each book in the series includes six 40-minute studies designed to draw you into God’s Word through basic inductive Bible study. There are 16 titles in the series, with topics ranging from fasting and forgiveness to prayer and worship. With no homework required, everyone in the group can work through the lesson together at the same time. Let these respected Bible teachers lead you in a study that will transform your thinking—and your life.

Titles Include:

•The Essentials of Effective Prayer •Being a Disciple: Counting the Cost

•Building a Marriage That Really Works •Discovering What the Future Holds

•Forgiveness: Breaking the Power of the Past •Having a Real Relationship with God

•How Do You Walk the Walk and Talk the Talk? •Living a Life of Real Worship

•How to Make Choices You Won’t Regret •Living Victoriously in Difficult Times

•Money & Possessions: The Quest for Contentment •Rising to the Call of Leadership

•How Do You Know God’s Your Father? •Key Principles of Biblical Fasting

•A Man’s Strategy for Conquering Temptation •What Does the Bible Say About Sex?


Kat said...

One of my oldest friends I met in my freshman year of high school. We were always together and we helped each other through those 4 years. After high school out relationship has done several things, including growing apart, and somehow growing back together. We have matured and are now at a point where we can talk for hours like we were never apart, and then we may not talk for a few months.

Sheila said...

I am an introvert at heart. I know that may be hard for some to believe but it's true. And introverts are more inclined to have a few close friends rather than a lot of dear friends. It's also true that it takes about five years for a new town to really feel like home. So having moved in the past years to a new town and state, I'm still learning to make Austin, TX feel like home. I have a few lifelong friends from my college days. We don't live close but they are those type of friends that you can see once every few years and it feels like you just saw each other yesterday. Those friendships are a true gift from God. No matter how far apart you may be, they're always close. But I have one very dear friend here in Austin. Our husbands use to work together when we both moved to Austin in 2005 and we have boys the same age. We ran into each other at the park one day and the relationship blossomed from there. Now our boys are best buds and we go into withdrawal if we don't see each at least once a week. We don't really live close. We're a good 30 minutes apart and with her now being pregnant with her fourth and me busy with school days, life has tried to take us in different directions. So it's a little work to stay connected sometimes. But we make it happen.

Rachel said...

My best friend I met in high school, in Nigeria. She was a missionary kid too who was a year behind me in high school. We're now married and have boys who's birthdays are a couple days apart. We've drifted apart at times but facebook is great for keeping us in contact now.

Amy said...

Good reminder that #2 is for daily life...can you believe that picture of us is from about a year ago? My how life has changed! :)

Jenn said...

I made several lasting friendships through college and I am very thankful for each one! I was never able to keep friends in high school, I didn't run in the correct crowds and such. It was a breath of fresh air to meet girls in college who loved the same things and we loved spending time together. My favorite thing is each one of us understands how busy life can be and even though we do not speak for weeks, we each know that we think and care about each other. When we do get together, it is like we just saw each other yesterday. Luckily, we each had children during the last few years. 2 of us got to experience our first pregnancies and now we can share kid stories and can relate to each other!

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